Definition: Bitchin’ Sauce (nerb—noun + verb) is a bitchin’ (for lack of a better word) sauce sold at the San Diego farmers market. It comes in 3 varieties—original bitchin’ sauce, chipotle, and pesto. It’s both vegan and gluten-free. And the taste? It’s oh-em-gee out of this world! Almonds give the sauce its creamy base. While lemons provide a lovely kick at the end. Its only downfall—you can’t get it in Chicago. Hence my friend Amy’s question:

Amy: Can you help me recreate a sauce?
Me: Sure. I can try. [said with hesitation]
Amy: It’s vegan.
Me: Oh never mind, vegan is way out of my league. You’ll have to ask Genesis (our vegan friend).
Amy: I already did. She told me to ask you.
Me: Shoot. No promises though. [said with confidence]

Next thing you know, we’re sitting around Amy’s kitchen table. Pinkies lifted high. A chip cracker in hand. Palettes cleansed. Let the Bitchin’ Sauce tasting begin. Dip, taste, dip, taste, ponder. Dip, taste, pretend you know what you’re doing, write. And repeat.

100 chips later and the dip/taste sequence came to a close. We had a list of ingredients. And yes, we cheated by writing down the ingredients from the label. However, if the word “spices” had been a bit more specific, we could have saved those chips for another time. Travesty.

After the list was secured, we reconvened at Genesis’ house. Wrote up a rough recipe. And turned the VitaMix to high. A couple tweaks later. And Houston, we have Bitchin’ Sauce! Or darn close to it.

How to eat Bitchin’ Sauce

Eat it on a chip. Or even on a vegetable. Or drizzle over a Bitchin’ Bowl. San Diego peeps—how do you eat your Bitchin’ Sauce?

Print

Bitchin Sauce (Original)


  • Yield: about 2 cups 1x
Scale

Ingredients

3/4 c. + 2 tbsp. water
1/2 c. + 2 tbsp. grapeseed oil (or similar neutral oil)
1/2 c. raw almonds
1/4 c. + 2 tbsp. lemon juice, fresh
3 tbsp. nutritional yeast
2 cloves garlic
2 tsp. bragg liquid aminos
1/2 tsp. kosher salt
1/2 tsp. cumin
1/2 tsp. chili powder
1/4 tsp. coriander
1/4 tsp. paprika


Instructions

  1. Place all ingredients in a high-powdered blender (such as a VitaMix). Slowly blend for one minute. Turn the dial up to high, and continue to blend for 1-2 minutes or until smooth and creamy.
  2. Store in the refrigerator. Sauce may separate. Stir and it’s as good as new.

Notes

• Nutritional Yeast and Bragg Liquid Aminos can be found at Whole Foods. If you’re not vegan, the ingredients may seem like a bit of an investment. But let me tell you, it’s one worth making.

• 2 tablespoons = 1/8 cup (If you happen to have one of those laying around.)

• Although I haven’t tried it, I think a food processor will work to make this sauce.

• This sauce doesn’t last long enough in my fridge to figure out its shelf life.

• If you’re stopping through San Diego, you must give the real deal a try. It just might revolutionize your life. Word on the street—they may start shipping soon.

• If doing Whole30, coconut aminos can be substituted for bragg aminos.

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